“Mrs. Flake, this is Dr. …, I hate doing this over the phone, but I need to tell you that your baby is very sick and there is a chance he is not going to make it.” Those are the words I had to hear from a Dr. the day after Paxton was born. I was in complete shock then went into a massive breakdown as you could imagine.
Let me take you back 4 weeks ago. On Sunday September 2nd, Cullen and I put the boys to bed then watched a movie together. I joked saying, wouldn’t it be fun to have the baby on Labor Day?! Well, that is exactly what happened. We went to the hospital at 5am, early Monday morning. I had contractions all night long and sure enough I was indeed in labor. The nurse took my blood pressure a couple times and it was much higher than it usually was so they decided I could have Pre-eclampsia which meant I needed to be on a horrible medication called magnesium sulfate to prevent going into seizures. Yikes. Great start, huh?
I thought, how bad could this medication really be…..well, it sucked….big time. Has anyone else had to be on it? Let’s just say, you feel like you have the flu and you have double vision, which was a total nightmare. I’ll never forget trying to see what time it was throughout the day and I kept seeing 2 clocks on the wall. You can’t focus on anything. So…I had to be on that before delivery and 24 hours after. Fun stuff 🙂
I immediately requested the epidural. I don’t know what has changed in the last 7 years, but I could still feel my legs and thought, this can’t be good. I am going to feel everything. Sure enough, the epidural did not work that great. I still felt the contractions most of the time. Nightmare. Ok, fast forward a few hours and Paxton was finally born at 4:22pm. He was beautiful. The pain I felt was gone as soon as he came.
They laid sweet Paxton on my chest for about 20 minutes. He had the pulse ox on his hand so they could watch his oxygen level. At first all was well, but the nurse was a little concerned that his oxygen level was a little low so she took him to the Dr. to get checked out further. That was the last I saw Paxton at the hospital I delivered him at. I had no idea what was ahead.
Within a couple hours I was told that Paxton needed to be transferred to another hospital that was more equipped to help his lungs. I thought, ok this is just like what my 7 year old had when he was born. Since they were both 3 weeks early, they needed help developing their lungs for a few days. Boy was I wrong.
A few hours after they transferred Paxton, I got the dreaded phone call from the Dr. telling me how sick Paxton was and that there was a chance he wasn’t going to make it. He needed to be transferred to Children’s LA Hospital immediately. I could not even believe what I was hearing. Could I really lose this sweet baby boy that was just laying perfectly on my chest the day before? Needless to say I was a train wreck in my hospital room. I was all by myself left with those horrible words going over and over in my head from the Dr. and I couldn’t stop crying. It was uncontrollable. I have honestly never felt so much heartache in my life.
Fast forward to the next morning. My mom, dad and sister came in from AZ when they heard the news. Thank goodness they came. I desperately needed them. My mom stayed at the hospital with me and I got released Wednesday morning. At this point Paxton was at Children’s LA Hospital, one of the best hospitals in the country that specializes in helping the sickest babies.
There is no one who could have prepared me for how I was about to see my sweet baby boy.
I will never forget walking through the cold NICCU doors for the first time seeing my sweet Paxton laying lifeless in his plastic little bed with tubes and wires over his entire body. He was on a high frequency ventillator which shook his whole chest with air. I had never seen anything like it. It was horrible. Paxton had what was called Persistent Pulminary Hypertension that they believe he got from an infection while he was being delivered. Possibly from swallowing his meconium. I was so confused and scared.
To make a long story short, Paxton was at Children’s LA for 2 weeks. It seemed like an eternity. I drove every single day for an hour and a half each way to sit with my little boy. The nurses and Dr.’s were wonderful. They taught me so much about the condition Paxton had and told me once he is better there will be no long term effects. I was so grateful to hear this.
Cullen and I spent long days and nights in that NICCU room watching, waiting and sometimes sleeping. I won’t miss this one bit. After 2 weeks, the Dr.’s at Children’s LA decided Paxton was well enough to be transferred back to our hospital. He had more healing to do, but was no longer in danger.
Once Paxton was transferred back to our hospital, his progress was better and better. He quickly got off of his medication and we even got to hold him for the first time in 2 weeks.
Can you imagine not holding your new baby for 2 weeks?! It was so hard, but talk about a sweet moment when I got to hold him again.
On September 25th we got to take him home! I have never been so grateful. We could finally start our life with our new baby boy. Mason and Brady were so anxious to have their baby brother in our home. It was without a doubt the longest 3 weeks of our lives.
We’ve had Paxton home for 5 days and he is the sweetest little boy we could have ever asked for. I am grateful everyday for him. Through this whole experience, I received so many emails, Facebook, Twitter and Instagram comments from all of you praying for Paxton. I am so thankful and grateful he had prayers coming from all over the country. What a lucky little boy 🙂
Every time he falls asleep he smiles. I can’t help but think he’s still in touch with the angels. It melts my heart. Thanks again for all of your support, we love you all!
Love,
The Flake Family
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Jenny,
Hello. I am wiping my tears away as I leave you this comment. Wow, what a story. Thanks for sharing. Sending God’s blessings to you, Paxton and your family. Yes, I believe the angels are still by your side each day. Hugs from Alabama, Krissy M.
Thanks so much for sharing your story! You are a strong momma! He’s blessed to have you, and he is in touch with the angels <3
Dear Jenny, it is with great surprise that I read your post today. Let me tell you why.
I am writing to you from across the ocean with a big lump in my throat and tons of simpathy for you and your family. I totally understand what you have gone through and, believe me, it is true. I went through a similar situation with my first born child 13 years ago.
At the time I was living in London with my husband, away from my family (all of them in Spain) and friends. Alex, our baby, was very sick when he was born. The doctors could not find out what was wrong with him but he had fits in several ocassions. Initially they though it was epilepsy, then that it was a spine infection and, finally, they diagnosed him with brain damage. He spent two weeks in the neo-natal unit of the hospital where he was born, thank Godness it was a hospital specialized in sick children so he did not have to be transferred. After that, once he was stable, we took him home and re-took our lives. For a whole year we lived with the concern that our baby was not going to develop normally, taking his to check ups, etc. It was a stressful time and I remember how I used to make the effort to behave normal and look at the bright side of life although, deep inside, I kept thinking “is my baby ever going to be able to talk? or walk?, etc. Thing is that, against all odds, Alex developed with normality and never had any problems at all. He is a healthy boy, sharp, clever, sporty, etc (what can I say…I am his mom after all and he is perfect to my eyes).
The doctors were wrong in their diagnose and gave us the fight of our lives. At the time of finding out, we were so releived that my husband and I cried like babies for days.
Still, to this day, tears fill my eyes when I talk about this. I can’t help it. No matter how long ago this happened.
What you write about being on your own in hospital when the bad news were delivered, not having your family near, not being able to hold your baby for days, seeing him connected to a machine and covered with cables, the smile on his face when he is asleep, etc I could have written all of that myself.
I wanted you to know that, despite the distance, the age difference and the fact that I have never left a comment in your blog (although I have been reading you for some time now), I feel very very very close to you right now.
Enjoy the blessing of having your baby home now, a beautiful looking baby. He looks happy and content. Make the most of it no. You deserve it BIG TIME !!!
xxx Carmen
Wow that must have been so difficult for you to go through. He looks like such a sweet boy and I am so glad you are finally at home with him. My brother and sister-in-law have kind of been going through the same thing. My nephew was born 8/1 and began having seizures since his 2nd day of life. They were in a Korean hospital (both in the Army) and were not allowed to hold him and only got to see him 2x a day for 20 min. They were just transferred to San Antonio and get to hold their sweet boy whenever they want, which is great!
I hope you enjoy the time with your 4 boys. Such a beautiful family!
What an ordeal Jenny! I am so sorry that your family had to go through all of that, and i am so pleased that your sweet little boy is home safe and sound. You must have been frantic, I cant imagine going through that. He is such a gorgeous little boy. I am so pleased for you guys!
He is gorgeous and definitely chatting it up with the angels. 🙂 What a sweet smile!
I was on that nasty magnesium sulfate with my last baby (who was delivered four weeks early due to severe preeclampsia). I even had to do a second round of it two days after my baby was born. Really yucky stuff!
So glad your sweet baby boy is home with you. What a blessing!
What an adorable baby boy! I’m so sorry that I didn’t realize you were going through this trial. I would have been praying for you all if I had. I can completely understand what you’ve been through and how precious life has really become for you now. 23 years ago, my only child lay in an ICU with tubes and wires everywhere. She was not yet 6 months old and had just come out of open heart surgery to repair a defect that was incompatible with life. It’s hard to comprehend what surgeons do to little ones to keep them alive, but I’m so thankful. My girl has grown up healthy and whole, with only a little ADHD “issue” that she has learned to deal with in adulthood without meds. She graduated from college in 4 years, has a good job, lives own her own in a different state and just won a spot in the Miss Tennessee (Miss America) pageant to be held in June!
Enjoy your children. The time flies so much faster than anyone can ever explain to you.
Blessings…
Thank you for sharing the details since we knew your precious baby was in the hospital. So happy for him and your family! Giving thanks to the Lord on your behalf.
Thank you for sharing your life stories with us. I can’t imagine what all you and your family has gone through. God is good and We will always keep you guys in prayer. Your son is so adorable.
Oh, Jenny. I cannot even imagine the fear and uncertainty you felt. I am so glad he is finally home with you! xoxo
Thank God everything is fine now! Congratulations on your beautiful baby…I just started reading your blog recently after seeing the ‘virtual baby shower’ items on another blog…I love the yummy things you come up with. Enjoy these early times with your precious new boy 🙂
We’ve been praying for your family! We are so happy Paxton is home and doing well. He is such a cutie pie! You are amazing my friend! If you need anything, just let us know! xoxo
I was choking back the tears as I finished reading your post, Jenny. Little Paxton is such a beautiful baby. Thank God all is well. And, yes, that sweet little smile as he falls asleep has to be for his guardian angels still at their post.
Congratulations! Enjoy your precious little gift!
Wow!! What a story! What an amazing little boy! I am so glad he is well and you can all begin this new journey with this amazing little angel! 🙂
He is so beautiful!! I am so happy he is all better and is home with you now! 🙂
I am so sorry y’all had to go through all that. I can’t imagine! 🙁 So glad he is better. Love that pic of him smiling as he goes to sleep!
What a sweet little boy! All of our prayers were answered, hugs to your beautiful family!!!
Oh, okay, now the tears are falling and I am so grateful that all the prayers were heard for your family and dear sweet Paxton. Divine angels lead out the dark and the light always shines in the end. Love, and Light….
Your foodie fan.
I had a similiar experience with my first son, who is now 24. It still makes me cry when I think about it! Your sweet little boy is definitely a miracle as was mine. Congratulations!
I’m so, so glad to read a happy outcome to this story! I can only imagine what you’re family has been going through. Sending lots of love to you and yours. Congratulations on such a beautiful baby.
Praise God! Your story brought tears to my eyes. He is a BEAUTIFUL baby. This fellow-mommy is so happy for all of you.
Jenny – he is so beautiful. My prayers are with you and your sweet family. (my 2nd son is Brady also!) May God bless you and keep you always. Much love!
Ok, I’m in tears now! SO glad everything is ok with him! What a sweet little picture of him smiling.
Wow, I can’t even begin to imagine what y’all have been through. Thank you for sharing Paxton’s incredible story. I’m so thankful and happy for you that he’s doing much better now! 🙂
Sweet Jenny, many thoughts and prayers have been with you. We are so thankful that your precious baby is home now. To God be the glory! Extra long-distance special hugs to you and Paxton. He has the same birthday as my mom!
Jenny…I have been following your blog for years now. I myself had a baby boy who spent 34 days in the NICCU. It was one of the scariest things I have ever had to do. But…that was almost 10 years ago and I now have an extremely healthy boy who is the light of my life. Thanks for sharing your story. Your story will help someone else who has to face this issue in the future.
Good luck and enjoy your sleepless nights. You are one lucky lady.
Dearest Jenny – Flake Family….
I read every single line and my heart did – BOOM BOOM:-(
Its not an easy story and very hard to go through all those hard moments.
Im happy that everything went finally on the right side.
Your amazing baby is adorable ! and his Mom is the Best ever 🙂
Wish you all the family all the best ! great and loving moments ! happiness !!!
And good life !!!
Love you from Israel……
Kisses….
Yafit
just wanted to say that the last picture you posted made me laugh out loud – what a great smile he has
Congratulations, he’s beautiful! My 2 year old had the same thing happen and ended up in the NICU for a week. You’d never know it now looking at him though! I’m so happy baby Paxton is home with y’all now!
Oh my gosh. How scary that must have been! He looks like such a blessing though. I can’t imagine how much agony you must have been in especially not being able to hold him! I’m so glad he’s doing well.
Jenny, I am so glad he is home and doing good! I was on Magnesium with Riggs and I thought I was dying! After throwing up and diarrhea at the same time (TMI) and my body feeling like it was on fire, I made my mom unplug my IV machine out of the wall. I felt like I couldn’t lift my lungs to breathe! I am so sorry you have been going through all of this! He is the cutest thing!
Thank you for sharing with us and can I just say WHAT A DOLL HE IS. I am so happy with the end of your story and am crying here about your precious baby boy. Thank goodness everything is so much better now. I am so thankful he is better and home with his family. Will be thinking of him and all of you <3 <3
Jenny, I am so sorry to hear the struggles you went through the past month. What a traumatic situation. I have kept you all in my thoughts. I am so happy for you that your sweet Paxton is now home with you and your family. I wish you both continued good health and recovery! Sending you my blessings!
Oh my goodness! What a relief for you to be able to have your son finally home after such a horrible ordeal! He is so so beautiful and he looks absolutely perfect and right at home in your arms. Congratulations on his safe return! Praise the Lord!!
Jenny, What wonderful news. Nothing like a mother’s love. I felt your pain while reading your story. What an incredible little fighter. AND I just love how he smiles through it all. God has blessed your family. Will keep praying for Paxton!!!!
You guys are so strong, thumbs up for ya!!!!
I can’t imagine what an experience that was!
I wish you guys days filled with love, hope, joy, hugs and all the sweet things you can think of!!!
Love,
Anisa